There is no number of dates that guarantees a good decision. Waiting can suit one couple; becoming intimate earlier can suit another. What matters is…
Bedroom Talk
When Intimacy Feels One-Sided: Say What Is Missing
It is possible to have an active sex life and still feel overlooked. The issue may be whose preferences set the pattern, who is expected to adapt, or…
Playful Escapades
I Returned to Dating at 45. My Expectations Were Still 30.
After a decade-long relationship, I returned to dating at forty-five and discovered that the other people had been aging while I was busy. This struck…
Confessions & Secrets
“You’re My Person” Was Not an Agreement About Exclusivity
He was in his early thirties. She had recently left an eighteen-year relationship. Within weeks of meeting, she was telling him, “You’re my person,”…
Playful Escapades
The Handbag Was Expensive. My Explanation Was Getting More Elaborate.
I bought a Chanel bag and told my husband it had cost two hundred dollars at a thrift shop. The bag was beautifully made. The explanation had several…
Bedroom Talk
When Your Sexual Preferences Change in a Long Relationship
Knowing a partner well is useful until it becomes a reason to stop asking. A preference that suited you years ago may still fit, may have changed, or…
Playful Escapades
My Ex Returned. I Did Not Have a Speech Prepared.
After a year without contact, my ex, Chris, asked to meet for coffee. I agreed, then spent an unreasonable amount of time deciding what a woman who had…
Playful Escapades
She Packed the Lingerie. I Wrote the Rest of the Itinerary.
When Claire put the little white lingerie bag in her suitcase, I immediately revised my expectations for our business trip. Until then, the itinerary…
Playful Escapades
My Husband’s Secret Second Refrigerator
My husband, Ben, had a secret refrigerator in the basement. I appreciate that “secret” is an ambitious word for an appliance that hums, requires…
Confessions & Secrets
My Father Keeps Starting Over. The Women He Leaves Behind Cannot.
My father, Mark, is excellent at beginnings. He remembers your coffee order, listens carefully to your disappointments, and explains that his previous…