For a while, seeing her was easy. We spent time together, became intimate, and I developed feelings. We’d been seeing each other for a few months, and the beginning gave me plenty of reasons to think it might go somewhere.
Then she became distant. I asked her out several times, but she was busy or canceled. There was never another day offered, no suggestion that we could try again when her schedule stopped behaving like an international diplomatic crisis.
Eventually, I noticed I was doing most of the work. I was the one asking, making myself available, and keeping the possibility of another date alive. I still liked her. I was also getting tired of having that feeling assigned so much administrative work.
Last week, I stopped chasing. I didn’t ignore her or announce a new policy. I just stopped being quite so available and put more attention into my own life. I’d begun moving on and talking to other women. There wasn’t much ceremony involved.
Over the past two or three days, she’s suddenly become much more interested in my phone. Replies arrive almost instantly. She sends flirty selfies, double snaps, and starts conversations herself. After all that difficulty arranging time together, we apparently have excellent digital availability.
I’m pleased to hear from her. That’s the inconvenient part. My feelings didn’t disappear just because I stopped volunteering to keep things going. If she made a genuine effort to see me, I’d be open to it.
Still, more messages haven’t explained what changed. Maybe she’s interested again. Maybe she noticed the attention had gone quiet and would like it restored. From my end, those possibilities currently look remarkably similar.
I don’t want a routine where I pursue her, she retreats, I step back, and suddenly we’re flirting again. We’ve managed that much choreography without arranging another date. Should I let her make the next move—and see whether it includes an actual plan?
