I started my first job about a month ago, and there’s a woman at work I think is cute. That is the complete list of things I know with confidence. Everything after that requires interpretation, and apparently I have appointed myself to do all of it.
She’s friendly. Unfortunately, friendly is also a perfectly normal way to behave toward a coworker. She might want to be friends. She might just be polite. We work together, which gives her an excellent practical reason to be pleasant that has absolutely nothing to do with me being especially interesting.
I barely know her. I’m not even sure whether I like her beyond thinking she’s cute, because finding that out would involve getting to know her. This seems reasonable until I reach the part where I would need to do something about it.
I’d like a way to talk outside work. Nothing elaborate. Just the chance to find out whether we have anything to say to each other when we aren’t there because someone put us on a schedule.
But what do I ask for? Snapchat doesn’t feel right. I barely use it, and it feels a little childish to me. Asking someone to contact me through an app I rarely open also seems like a weak opening move. Welcome to getting to know me; your message may be discovered eventually.
Her phone number would be simpler, except that asking for it feels so direct. It sounds like I’ve reached a conclusion when I’m still trying to gather enough information to have one. I want to know her better, but I don’t know how much interest she would hear in that question—or whether she would welcome it.
So I’m still at the same point: a month into the job, interested enough to want a conversation, and unsure how to move one beyond work. I haven’t asked for anything yet. A phone number contains ten digits. I would appreciate it behaving like a smaller request.
