I have a question for people who recognize avoidant tendencies in themselves: do you want to change the way you approach relationships, or are you comfortable continuing as you are?
I’m interested in that distinction because recognizing a pattern and wanting to change it are two different things. Saying, “Yes, I tend to pull away,” doesn’t necessarily tell me how you feel about doing it.
Maybe you see it as an issue you’d like to address. Maybe you’re aware of it but don’t feel a strong desire to approach relationships differently. I don’t want to assume that everyone who uses the same description has the same goal.
I’m also curious whether your answer feels settled. Is changing something you actively want, something you’re unsure about, or simply not a priority for you?
I’m asking about your own experience, rather than what someone else thinks you should want. When you notice yourself creating distance in a relationship, does that feel like a problem you hope to work on—or does the distance suit you?
