I’ve been told I’m a people pleaser. This becomes relevant when I’m planning a date, because apparently “I want you to have a wonderful time” can generate a surprising amount of administrative work.
I think of myself as an old-school romantic. Once I know someone—what she likes, what catches her attention, what she’d happily rearrange an evening for—I can usually plan something good. The trouble is that gathering those clues can take a few months. Early on, I’m operating with enthusiasm and an incomplete file.
So I want input. What day works? What food sounds good? Is there an event you’ve wanted to attend, or a place that means something to you? In my head, these questions help me plan a date you’ll actually enjoy. On your phone, they might look like another task waiting for a response.
That’s what I’m wondering about, especially if you’re already stressed and burned out from work and life. Would twenty or thirty minutes of texting about plans feel worthwhile? Or would you rather I simply choose something and tell you when to show up?
I can see the appeal of “Wednesday night, beer and a burger.” It has a day, a meal, and very few opportunities for a follow-up questionnaire. But what if you don’t particularly like the restaurant? What if I cook supper and proudly serve something you would never have requested?
Given a little collaboration, maybe we could plan a walk by the river to see the dragon boats, then stop at the local beaver sanctuary while the residents build dams and gather wood. There’s an outing with some character. The beavers, at least, arrive knowing what they intend to accomplish.
These are possibilities, not a date I’ve already arranged. I’m trying to work out how much planning together feels considerate and how much feels like I’ve handed you the clipboard.
Would you enjoy helping shape an evening around something you really want to do? Or, after a long week, would “Wednesday. Burger. I’ve got it” be the most romantic sentence available?
