I joined Match a couple of months ago because I wanted to go on dates. So far, I’ve mostly acquired a question: Why does asking to keep talking on the app seem to end so many conversations?
Finding someone I’m interested in is already a slow process. I don’t often come across a profile that makes me want to know more, which means that when I do, I’m hopeful. There’s finally someone I’d like to talk to. That feels like a reasonable beginning.
Then comes the request to move the conversation somewhere else.
I’m wary of scammers, so I prefer not to give out my contact information immediately. I even got an alternate number to protect my real one. Still, having that precaution doesn’t make me eager to leave the app before I feel comfortable.
When I explain that I’d like to stay there at first, the conversation usually stops. I’m left wondering what happened. Were they scammers? Were they simply impatient? Would someone who was interested really mind chatting through the service where we’d just met?
I don’t know the answers. A conversation going quiet doesn’t tell me much, except that another possibility has disappeared.
There have been a couple of men I communicated with outside the app, too. Neither connection went anywhere. So even when I’ve taken that step, it hasn’t led to the dates I hoped for.
Before joining Match, I’d been away from online dating for a while. I did go on two dates, and both men seemed like quality people. I remember that because it gives me something real to measure this stretch against. Meeting someone decent hasn’t always felt so far out of reach.
I’d like to get out there again. For now, though, I’m still at the same awkward point: interested enough to keep talking, cautious enough to stay on the app, and wondering why those two things seem so hard to put together.
