I’m 24, and until recently, I’d never tried talking to a woman with romantic intentions. I’ve been single my whole life, partly because dating never interested me much. I’m also shy and socially awkward, which hasn’t exactly sped things along.
Then I decided to try. I don’t have a particularly convincing explanation for the timing. I just started texting women, and while playing Carrom Pool, I met someone. We exchanged Instagram accounts and began chatting.
She was much more comfortable than I was. She even called me. On the phone, she seemed fun, outgoing, and a little tomboyish. I was excited, although part of me wondered whether talking so freely was easier for her because she could disappear whenever she wanted.
Sometimes the conversation flowed. Other times, she’d talk about her ex, who had suddenly left without explaining why. I had no experience to draw on and very little idea what to say. My contribution was usually some version of “That happens. You have to move on.” Even to me, that doesn’t sound like much help.
For a few days, things felt interesting and exciting. Then the conversations lost momentum. Now she barely replies.
She tells me I don’t know her life. She describes her parents as demons and talks about the man she loved ghosting her as though she never existed. Sometimes she says I can’t help her anyway. I don’t know what kind of response she’s hoping for, or whether she wants one.
When I suggested we could be friends, she quickly became casual with me, using “Rey” and “Ra.” That made her seem comfortable again, but it didn’t tell me whether she was interested in anything beyond friendship.
I’m not looking for a serious relationship right now. I’ve thought about asking whether she’d be open to something casual, even a rebound. But that’s still only an idea in my head. She hasn’t agreed to anything, and she barely answers the messages I’m already sending.
I want some dating experience without making a fool of myself or treating her hurt as an opening. With so little experience of my own, I’m struggling to read this. Is there something here worth asking about, or am I trying to restart a conversation she’s already letting end?
