I like knowing that my husband finds me attractive. I like it slightly less when I am trying to complete a set at the gym and he appears to be…
Marriage & Desire
Money Questions on Early Dates: Curiosity, Compatibility, and Privacy
A question about money can be practical, intrusive, awkwardly phrased, or some combination of the three. One early question does not reveal a date’s…
Confessions & Secrets
Two Accounts of Betrayal, and Two Different Endings
The fireworks had started. I was on the couch with our dog, Duffy, trying to understand messages my wife had sent about meeting another man. The trip…
Playful Escapades
I Stopped Drinking. My Friends Kept Offering Reviews of My Personality.
I stopped drinking because I disliked how I felt the next day. My wife knew. Most of our friends did not, largely because I did not feel my choice of…
Playful Escapades
Five Marriage Myths That Did Not Survive the Laundry
Fairytales tend to end at the wedding. This is a sensible editorial decision: several chapters about agreeing on a thermostat setting would slow the pace.
Confessions & Secrets
Ten Months After the Affair, I Still Did Not Trust Her
We had been married for four years when I discovered my wife’s affair. I decided to try to stay. Ten months later, I was still looking for evidence…
Confessions & Secrets
The Paid Images Were One Problem. The Secrecy Was Another.
On Halloween, my husband told me he had contacted an adult account offering intimate images for $50. He said he was telling me because the account had…
Marriage & Desire
Wanting a Relationship Without Giving Up Your Independence
You can enjoy your own home, routines, and company while still wanting a partner. The tension does not necessarily mean you fear commitment. It may…
Playful Escapades
He Said “I Love You” at a Moment That Needed a Follow-Up
We had been dating for a few weeks when Ben said he loved me during oral sex. It was not a moment that lent itself to an extended clarification.
Bedroom Talk
How to Talk About a Partner’s Fantasy Without Making Assumptions
A fantasy is a better subject for a conversation than a surprise reconstruction. Even when you think you know what your partner likes, the missing…
Bedroom Talk
Want to Kiss Him? Make the Interest Clear
You can make an invitation appealing; you cannot make another person want to kiss you. Fortunately, the first task is simpler, and it leaves both…
Playful Escapades
Date Night Ended. His Game Had Just Begun.
Jessica had planned dinner with Ryan, and dinner had gone well. They had talked, sat close, and come home with the comfortable feeling that the evening…