Five dates into seeing a guy from Hinge, I’ve been invited to Friendsgiving. I’m 35, he’s 39, and apparently we’ve reached the part where other people may learn my name.
The dates have gone well. One was a whole day out of town, and we’ve had a few sleepovers. I like him. That feels relevant, because my hesitation about the invitation could easily sound like I’m looking for an escape route. Mostly, I’m trying to work out how quickly things are moving.
He already asked me to be exclusive. That felt a little fast, but I agreed. I’m not talking to anyone else, and I do want to keep seeing him. The answer made sense to me even if the timing caught me slightly off guard.
Then yesterday he asked whether I wanted to come to his Friendsgiving dinner, and I didn’t know what to say.
Meeting his friends feels like a different step. So far, we’ve been getting to know each other between ourselves. At dinner, I’d be meeting people who already know him, probably all at once, while also attempting to behave normally around a holiday meal. That is several assignments.
The complicating detail is that I don’t have Thanksgiving plans. I don’t have family or close friends in the US, so there isn’t another dinner on my calendar. An invitation to spend the holiday with people is appealing. I can appreciate that and still feel unprepared to arrive as the person he’s dating.
I was married for many years and only started dating again this year. I don’t have much recent experience to compare this with. Maybe five dates, exclusivity, and a holiday invitation are a perfectly ordinary sequence. Maybe he simply wants to include me.
I’m still caught at the invitation. I like the man, I have nowhere else to be for Thanksgiving, and I’m not sure I’m ready to meet his friends. Somehow, an offer of dinner has become the most difficult question so far.
