I’m starting to think having a type is mostly theoretical. It sounds convincing right up until somebody comes along and ruins the system.
I like the idea that I know what attracts me. It suggests a certain competence. Here are my preferences; here is the general direction of my romantic life. Very orderly. Almost suitable for a spreadsheet.
Then there’s the possibility of ridiculous chemistry with someone who doesn’t fit any of it. What am I supposed to do with that? Explain that, although the attraction is impressive, their application doesn’t meet the previously established criteria?
I’m not talking about changing my mind after a careful review. I mean the sort of attraction that makes the review seem like an administrative error. Someone can be entirely outside the category I’d confidently describe as “my type,” yet apparently qualify for my undivided attention.
The irritating part is that I’d still like to claim I know myself. I’d just prefer that claim not be tested by another adult being unexpectedly appealing.
So now I’m curious: have you ever met someone who wasn’t your usual type, but the chemistry was ridiculous? And did you retire the system afterward, or quietly revise it and pretend that had been the policy all along?
